Where to Go

Deep inside my heart I know buddhism is where I shall be going. However reading many writings on jesus christ, do makes me wonder if one day I would go to church. Having many Christians around me especially hubby's sisters and aunt, I think they would welcome me happily. The question is am I ready? 

Since the day I've spoken to my 大姨 of my left shoulder pain which God indicate to me is a bloodline karma, I feel the readiness to go into christinity. Me always be me, never go into something blindly unless I have a very good reason. inevitable with 大姨 support I feel more ready it could be we are from the same bloodline? Anyway, I ask myself, for all the books and workshops i've been, what did I see and learn about for this physical plane? 

1. I know christianity does not paint the whole picture but christianity is the only religion that reap the most benefit from the universe. Why? According to the law of the universe book, i conclude that christian teachings are mostly based on that. Trust, surrender and Let Go. (one of many from the book) What other religion teaches you this? How many ppl can really Trust, surrender and Let Go? If you do not have a religion I don't think many can do this, but the law of the universe is to Trust the universe, surrender and Let Go to the creator the universe. For many these are vague so they cannot concentrate, they need GOD to comfort them. The law of the universe has been used for many religion and I feel christianity get the MOST out of it. It could be unfair to say about this because many authors are western and their religion started with christianity 1st, for buddhism, I haven't come across that has written a spiritual book. 

2. I've never been attached to any temple. My mum would just bring me and pray and we go home. Hence I do not know if they have charity work weekly. For christians I know they always organize something for the members to do weekly. Going to the orphanage, old age home, teaching children etc. I wanted to be in a community like this as I know I'm lacking in this area. I have not been given enough I feel. Hence, going to church I'm pretty OK cos I know I will have a chance like this. Not so much of devoting to any GOD, but knowing these are the things I should be doing. Right now, the volunteers asked me to come to the temple on sunday I guess the universe/GOD is telling me to observe further. Choose again when it has finish unfolding. I want my kids to expose to charity or serving others when young, for my little wisdom, I always thought only christianity has this. Will wait for a sign where shall my kids and I be going.

Although I've started with buddhism, I've learn more of christianity from books and ppl around me. I think my guides are opening doors for me to explore. Hence I landed on the temple in breakfield, kneel down and talk to buddha, bought a book, get 2 free Dharma talk CD and some friendly chat with the volunteers there. The CD talks about what is buddhism which are quite spiritual to me. The perception that I had and things happening around us and all the pantang larang are actually not really buddhism. (some deviation there, oh well look at christians how many types! all religion the same) How absurd? How come now only I've been given the 2 free CDs for buddhism enlightenment? Free somemore! Time to Grow again!

Like one of the book said, you have to go and do it, experience it and kill it. In the end you need to know this life is a solitary path, attachment will not get you anywhere but you need to feel and experience attachment then only you know how detachment feels like, then you can only feel the real freedom. But pls don't wait until you are dying. When you are on physical plane do Dana (charity) and sila (good deeds) to add your merits/ good karma points, everyday life we are using from this bank, don't let it depletes. Anyway, if you are a christian, the church would have tones of chance to do this, as the community is small everyone has attention. Unlike buddhism, our temples not as many as Christian church so we need to pickup ourselves, and there is lack of 'pastor' to guide us. Fellow buddhist .. we got to pick ourself up and be responsible for our life. If you want to have privilege to be taken care of, go join any church then the pastor and cell leader will take care of you (to make sure your good karmic bank account is always filled).

As for myself, I think it's still unfolding, i will give it some time and wait for the path to be clearer for me to walk/run. Namaste.