Strawberry Park Resort

Family trip to Cameron Highlands. Pei is on a week holiday before she starts her new posting. She choose to go Cameron and we happily tag along a free trip :) It's  a 2 night stay at Strawberry Park Resort.  This hotel is newly refurbish, the condition is good - a 3/4 star hotel condition and service. I have wonderful mountain view, Breathe in the mountain energy every morning, feels so good :) This resort also comes with free breakfast and dinner, the food are just OK if you are not too fussy. 

Day 1: Strawberry Picking at EQ Farm

Day 2: Tea Plantation, Cactus Farm and Mushroom Farm, High Tea at YTL resort, Starbucks

Day 3: Boh Tea Plantation

Fish plant

I'm Gonna EAT you!

5th Birthday

My Little princess has turned 5 years old. Academically she is doing really well, music, dancing is what she likes most. The only thing she lack is love for her brother. It could be her friend profile and the 7Killing in her year pillar, she does not confront anyone infront of you but will do small little things to hurt the brother like trip him over or smack him in the buttock or face. I had a hard time figuring out how is she feeling and how I can improve her emotional state :( Anyway, it's a happy event, I will leave it to the divine to 'teach' me how to balance up andrea's emotion :) 

We had birthday celebration at the school with the blue cake below. This year birthday andrea choose Little twin stars, hence I gave 2 stickers with the below graphic to the cake designer. Tah-Dah ... we are very satisfied with it :) Andrea is really happy too !! In the evening we went to Rakuzen in Subang Empire for family celebration, she ate so much and enjoy open her present in the restaurant. Luckily we have a room to ourself. We puff up balloons as the kids really enjoy puffing it with the puffer and handed all the guess with our Japanese snack party bags. It's a simple celebration but it brings so much memory to me, my little girl is almost spiritually ready to be independent and do things on her own more. I will miss all the moment I'm with her when she was a baby.

I have one more year to 'shape' her character and to usher her back to the correct (spiritual) path. I sincerely pray and hope the divine can lend me a helping hand, attracting good schools, good events, good teachers and many other that help andrea & I grow to be a person that is full of Love and Light. My wish for andrea, to be able to do everything that she wants and always be happy and Loved. Amen.  

Maid leaving

Funny how things come and go without dropping any hint. My maid is leaving 20th june 2012. Decided 1 week ago. I'm of course feeling uncertain, afraid that I could not cope but on the bright side i know it will be good for the kids. I grew up with maid, it takes some time (years) for me to stand up on my own feet, I had maid again when my 1st child was born. First maid was great, 2nd and 3rd sucks (only stayed 1 week with me), 4th maid was OK but always need reminder and mistakes all the time, the worst part is my children do not really like her. Crying and Wailing everyday :( Since I'm a SAHM now, i guess it's time for me to take full responsibility. 

this forum lifted my spirit. These bunch of people like me ... and I particular like this :

one thing we have to learn, from the stage of having maid to no maid, is to to lower our expectation. The house would never be sparking clean and neat as before. We have to bear with that, do our best and not tired ourselves up. Also try to get all family members to be involved in housework.  Don't be so stress up, its fine if the house is not sparking clean. Most important is the peoples who live in the house are happy.

My floors were mop everyday, it's really clean .. and this makes me happy. I do not know if I would get depression when maid goes home. I pray very hard that hubby will not turn on his harsh mode when maid is not around. He is one of the kind that do not consider my feelings/ emotion, his favourite past time is to pick on me. He hates his mum cos of some bad habits and I had one of the bad habit that he hates (like his mum) - this could be his childhood subconscious. Hence he is particularly harsh on me sometimes. I pray that I could get over this or to send someone who could support me whole heartedly instead. 

SN told me, when things go wrong, many times it's not about learnings. It's at that point of time how we were feelings attracted these people & event to us. It's nothing wrong to send your maid back, now i Understand cos i never wanted to trust him. For now, maid, husband or friends, it works the same way. If we are feeling low, we tend to attract 'bad' friends and keep asking ourself WHY. Actually we don't have to dwell in it, recognize it and walk away. I'm not saying my husband is not good, but if he thinks being his wife is another 'maid' & no effort needed, I really have no choice to walk away. All human deserve happy life, do not force yourself and give all sorts of reason for comfort, it's just bad timing. TIMING factor that is. 

Childhood clearing

I have heard and read alot about treating your child as best as you can because it will impact the whole life - 三岁定八十. I always feel i'm the most fortunate baby girl in the world but never recall bad things that happened to me. This gave me stronger urge to bring my children up myself, hopefully I will be positively influence the kids instead. 

it all started when andrea drank the expired milk. I could not let go, hence i exploded again (it actually dragged for 2 weeks). The 1st time happened I felt really bad and I feel there must be some lost souls or my ancestor staying in my energy field hence i have consciously clear it daily and it was alright for a few months. This time it happened again, I hold my crystal ball, crying to myself asking the divine what could it be, i know it's not the disincarnate souls disturbing for sure, what is it !!! Divine show me a series of my childhood pictures, i look at it and cried my hearts out ... it didn't seems so painful to me at that time and i didn't remember it to be so painful. I felt my pain and I felt my mother's pain. My mum hitting me and ignoring me in many occasion .... after finish 'watching movie' i now have an answer - my subconscious mind. No one right and No one is at wrong. Things happen for a reason. Since this is stuck with me i need to clear it (still don't know how) and send the maid back. 

I am so sorry for not respecting you, I lost control. Thank you for bringing this up for me to clear. I wish you all the best. You may not be the best maid but anyhow has helped me alot. Hope the extra 1 month salary is enough for your family. I'm sorry for not letting you to finish your 2 years contract. 

Being too Harsh

when you look up to a starry night, you wonder where do all these stars comes from. why do they look so magical to you. put science and facts aside, enjoying the starry night, looking beyond them, you realized life can be as beautiful as the stars when you look beyond what is happening around you. Nothing is permanent or certain, let it go. release. release. release. all is well. God Bless. 

1. andrea drank an expired dutch lady milk. I was too furious and weaken my heart chakra again. Scolding consecutive 3 days. I am exhausted. Hubby said - what's maid for? I said - to help me. Hubby continue - did she helped you. I said - yes, but ... . Hubby interrupted - yes is enough, others is not important. Thank You. 

2. was feeling low, when arriving at dentist told myself to change my thoughts. a whatssap message came: sorry, forgot to send you the picture, here it is. aww ... i felt my spirit being lifted. Thank you divine and this friend of mine, just in time for me to change my thoughts and lift my spirit before seeing the dentist. Thank You. 

3. went to dentist today for checkup. dentist ask - what can i do for you. I said - i have one cavities, i want to do scaling and checking. dentist said - sorry you only have 30min, we cannot do it all. We can only do checking. I said - HUH. in disbelief. dentist said you can come back and make an 1 hour appointment. had my teeth checked, 1 medium cavities and 2 small cavities, going back there tomorrow. hmph ...

feel like chanting today but hear the maid voice i felt discouraged. when will this be over? visualizing the matter is so small like a pin whole, take an iron to iron over it. ta-dah ... no more hole ... healed! Thank you :) sounds crazy but hope it work this time :)

Last month with musicpro

songs in the air, whisper in the heart. This is a wonderful cue to what is coming to your life. My intention of having suzuki violin for andrea is that she could develop her right brain too when playing music. I have been to 2 suzuki violin teachers, does the right brain really come into place? given the opportunity with shichida for 4 years, the answer is - 50% maybe. So what is it? Love and patient only, ops and the suzuki system/ book. I guess this is what right brain is for. The others? conventional violin lesson could offer I guess. 

Can local teacher without much love or should i call it life experience of having love to demonstrate love to the student as per what Mr. suzuki wants all his teacher to have? I'm saying, if you have Japanese teachers - expect your student to be discipline. if you have English teachers - expect your student to be expressive. if you have different background teachers then your student will get their quality. suzuki system is in suzuki book & you can learn from it, all important points and notes are inside that book. I'm happy to have seen 2 teachers on how they taught it. I will try to teach Benjamin myself. 

Right now, I have put a stop to suzuki violin. I need teacher who can work with me so that andrea could benefit from violin lesson. at 5 years old, conventional violin would say they are too small - I will try to look out for academy near my place, worst come to worst will go to bently (quite far from my place :( ). Divine, pls guide me. Thank You!

Saying Prayers

For the stars that is out of reach, it's always touched by the hands of imagination. Children loves make believe, could it be the best time to lead them to the world of magic? What more for the parents who does not believe, the door of the kingdom of God will be closed by one selves.  

I always ask myself when is the best time to introduce God to my children? If they see me chant, pray and meditate will it help to interest them? The answer is they do not bothered :) 

I started saying prayers with them 2 months back. each one of them different set of prayers. mostly to their own guardian angels. by feelings, sometimes we pray to kuan yin and jesus christ. Benjamin would say, my turn mummy, then follow what we need to say :) It's cute to see them saying after me, hope by one day they could pray on their own before going to bed. Sleeping time is the most important period for your body to heal and restore energy. Saying prayer, allow the divine to heal you when you sleep is a good practise. May all be healthy physically, mentally and spiritually :)