30 July 2010

2 Months at home

Tomorrow mark the full 2 months being a SAHM. How do i feel? EXHAUSTED .... Taking care of the house & family is not an easy task, i really respect those stay at home mum, they are the greatest! Being me the perfectionist - the floor must be clean (hubby's territory), kids must eat healthy food, everything must be organize after one used, children should obey parents ... etc is really killing.

(1) I have learn not to FORCE things when it's not happening, however i still fail when ben doesn't want to drink his damn milk
(2) I must say my feelings towards hubby has improve a little, as he is more understanding now and is a great helping hand when i went insane. Last time i used to think we will be divorced because we have not been through enough hardship together, I guess the pain that has cause 'us' have bring us to another  level of understanding. I used to think he is an idiot and never understands my emotion and needs.
(3) able to see ben grow in weight and height is the greatest achievement & comfort. I'm happy to see ben laughing out loud when he sits on the swing & now imitate his sister (shouting, playing, bouncing), it's really fun to just watch. Every time when he does new things will brighten up my days.
(4) The only short term achievement i have at home is PLAYFISH games on facebook. Beside taking care of the kids, i will sneak out a few mins during the day to play games, basically is to renew the time  to earn more money - restaurant city, country story & pirate ahoy is the game that I'm enjoying playing
(5) Weekend is busy busy busy .... have to juggle the time between groceries, shichida classes, children nap & shopping. as ben has started his shichida class, we have less time for shopping now. I seriously prefer weekdays!
(6) Weekday is food food & food. Children's food preparation - andrea & ben eating the same ingredient. ben's add more water, andrea's add more seasoning. You think is easy? not when ben is on bad mood, he will keep pulling your pants & wail when i'm preparing (cut, wash, rinse, soak) the ingredients.
(7) The most relaxing time is the evening time, andrea, ben & I will sit at the stairs to eat our snacks (biscuit) & enjoy the cool breeze. Andrea will talk to me without fussing, ben will eat his biscuit & looking at his sister talking to me. After snacks we will go to the play ground or will walk around the condo. After this, showering time is nightmare. Ben will shout & scream when i shower for andrea, i have tried everything, none of it worked (put on high chair, put on the floor - with lots of toys). Hence i just let him cry his lungs out. Terrible
(8) I always look forward for hubby to come back, he is my life savior and the only person i miss the most during the day. With hubby around, i feel less stressful and i think the kids are more happy too.
(9) I have learn a few things from reading books & also analyze my own bazi chart. I have learnt baby massage - to heal ben's 5 important organs (but i dunno why he is not drinking now, teething maybe?) and andrea's cough. I learnt the importance of family relationship, how to bring up a healthy child & how emotions (anger, worry, jealousy) will hurt our own organs!
(10) All in all, i learn how to LOVE. I think i love hubby, my kids and myself more now.

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