10 August 2013

Waldorf Teacher Training

I've learnt a new word here - Anthroposophy. They do not called it spirituality or any other term that we human has given to it. A new word! ah well ... it never sink into me like any other things in life, deep inside myself I already 'know', a name is not important to me. Maybe I hear more like 'spirituality' then I would maybe use Anthroposophy more often :)

I loved painting class the most, my soul was desperate for it maybe. Thank You teacher David. I was also guided to join grade 3, instead of grade 1&2, I take it as ... my childhood problem starts at age 9. My transition to be separated was not done properly, many times i feel alone and didn't want to be in a crowd. I lothe to be in a group of people honestly, especially interact club or leo club, when I see those human looked "shiok" to torture another human during their orientation I feel these bunch of people are from the lower vibration being (animals). During college, I met a group of friends that likes to laugh at other people so that they feel "shiok", i have the same disgusting feeling towards them. as within so without, I know something was wrong somewhere. I got the answer. age 9. Although their actions are not to my favour, I shall not have judgement or reaction of how they are behaving. (they are not doing it to me anyway). Now i understand why. 

During the class, we have 2 hours daily on 2 different books to discuss. These are all philosophy, spiritual ones, many participants has difficulty to understand what is being written, trying very hard to understand Steiner. Honestly, it's about how much 'spiritual' books you have read or heard in order to unlock your higher wisdom. The words are merely words, the meanings are in between the line. One participant said, she has to read ALOT (not spiritual books) to come into a conclusion but the conclusion is not what is being meant. I felt sad looking at a 'helpless' participant. I raised my hand and said: "my experience is to read and understand what you need to understand, the universe will bring you another form of understanding of this book to you, eventually you will understand the whole book. it may take years.  another method is to meditate on it, meditate on those vague sentences, sleep on it, while you are drive or eating or anything, you will have the answer. It's not about how much you read, it's about how much you can understand in between the lines. Meditate more, ask yourself to open up your third eye chakra (wisdom)." 

I'm glad to have attended this course. It talks about spirituality from conception - baby - toddler - young children - young adults - adults. I have not come across a spiritual books on these, this is my first! I'm glad to know, although i was guilty most of the time inside the class, but what has done - let it go. Human bound to make mistake, Human bound to have EGO, Human bound to be foolish. Detachment is the key, I cannot do it overnight, but let it be one step at a time. All my life, I wished for my children to be able to hold themselves up when I'm dead, I have found the key. However it is not as easy as ABC, I need to lead a spiritual life then only I could bring them onboard with me. Long journey, but at least we have started. Thank you! Another prayer answered. 


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